GolfHos

Round Two Matches:

BFBoy (11) v. Spaceage (13)
A surprisingly tight match, pitting BFBoy's legendary sandbagging against spacey's lack of golf skill and Mini-related lack of concentration.  BF jumped out early with a net eagle on #2, but some tired play mid-round squandered most of that gain.  Spaceage was a model of even scoring, avoiding both the low, rewarding numbers and the ugly high ones.
Spaceage +2, BFBoy +1.

Salamander (11) v. Fuzzy (4)
Sal comes out steady and stays that way, carding seven net pars and two net birdies (including both par-3s -- good ball-striking!).  Fuzzy is seeing his game come together.  His gross 79 included a front side with three bogeys and a birdie for 38.  A timely gross birdie was made on a stroke hole, nudging him through the tape first.
Fuzzy +7, Salamander +6.

Campy (8 ) v. Spanky (12)
Campy plays uneventful golf, carding only one big number and three net birdies.  Spanker Boy starts strong with net par, net birdie, then vomits a couple quads before parring the hardest hole on the nine (a sweet net-eagle dose of redemption), bogeying the second-hardest (net birdie) and making birdie on the next hole (net eagle) -- a run of +12 in three holes!  And that was the difference.
Spanky +7, Campy +1.

Uisce Beatha (9) v. Aske (5)
Whiskey played like crap, Aske played a course with a slope lower than I thought possible (96).  Uisce went around in lackluster fashion, but rallied with net eagle on the penultimate hole.  Playing aggressively, Aske made his errors on the stroke holes, except for a faltering natural double on his penultimate.  While that might sound dirty, the result is like one long make-out session with no release.
Halved, +1 to +1.

TFT (6) v. Clive (12)
Clive played surprisingly consistent golf, keeping his driver in the trunk while carding six net pars, two net birdies (on the two-stroke holes), and a net bogey (unseen OB swallowed tee shot by two strides).  Consistent golf isn't the name of the game in Stableford, though.  Proving why he's captain, TFT played a soft course and bolted out of the gate with par-birdie-par-par ... and that was before getting handicap strokes on the three of the first holes.  TFT generously downed some beer and the scoring rampage ended, but the damage had been done.
TFT +7, Clive +3.

Twoiron (3) v. JDerion (7)
JDerion had a hiccup early, putting himself in a hole.  The birdies didn't come easily, either, as he carded only two natural pars for the nine.  Twoiron proved that fatherhood agrees with him: overcoming bogeys on the opening two holes, he scored three straight birdie (one a net eagle) to put things out of reach.
Twoiron +9, JDerion 0.

Dunk (5) v. Teed (___)
Dunk played, and I can't really remember the details. so let's just assume it was LIGHTS OUT, baby!  Teed, sad to say, did not get out when he wanted.  He further confirms that his shoulder is out of commission, and therefore the match is forfeited.
Dunk, by forfeit.

1puttpar (10) v. MFAWG (8 )
MFAWG started the day with cantaloupe (man, that spelling looks wrong!), a sure way to go low.  And he did, bettering his course handicap by one with one natural and two net birdies and nothing worse than net bogey.  1puttpar was on fire, though, firing a natural six-over including three net birdies and finishing with a net eagle (gross birdie).  Scoring nine points in the first four holes always spells trouble for your opponent.
1puttpar +10, MFAWG +5.

Tdcoly (13) v. Golfer Ray (9)
Ted faltered when the bell rang, posting net double on the first; the score hit him hard, causing net bogeys on two of the next three to go negative-5 after only four holes.  Thereafter, he righted the ship and represented himself well.  Ray likewise net-doubled the first and net-bogeyed the second, rocketing to a negative-4 mark.  Our foreskinned man pressed on (or drank quickly) and saw his hole scores steadily drop.
Golfer Ray 0, tdcoly -4.

Wishi (Julie)(15) v. Stroh (9)
Julie and I differ on the math, so this one is subject to change without notice.  However, she played well and has a cute accent.  Hoping to throw her off her game, Stroh showed up in chaps and brandishing a microfiber cloth and a bottle of Pledge.  What he failed to bring was golf ability.  Luckily, he enjoys beating up on defenseless, well-endowed women.
Stroh, -2, Julie -5.


Round Two Score:
Team White Meat -- 4.5
Team Male Prepuce -- 5.5

Ryder Cup Score:
Team White Meat -- 12.5
Team Male Prepuce -- 7.5

What's the deadline for this round?

Excellent question.  My master plan requires I play a certain nine.  Domination assured.

Thank you sir.

Hey! I'm just shocked I read something right and retained it.  :sad3:

Oh and your welcome.  :)

I gave a little extra time in view of the Memorial Day holiday.

I might maybe get out this weekend.  Possibly.  Or I may play hooky a half-day and try that Skybrook bitch again.

I'll be going out tomorrow (Thursday) for this round.

Clive, PM sent.

While the rain is needed down here, this is really beginning to suck dirty pond water through a bent straw.

cool... I should find some time to get in several holes.... enough to get a win.....

what's the scoring format for this round again?

Goin' out today at seben fitty one for my Gerk round.

sure takin you awhile to finish  that 'gerkin'
 [sm_shock]

Round 2 results sent via PM to Clive.

Playing 18 tomorrow but it won't be a GHRC round.  Currently planning on turning in a nine hole round to be played Tuesday lunch time.

Roll the bones baby.  Let's see if I call it right.

I'm junk.   :sad3:

 [sm_dontknow] :redcard:

Fook.  Couldn't hit the ball out of my shadow.  Duff, top, skull.  Couldn't putt worth a *feces*.  You name it.  Hope I play better tomorrow.  Scramble tourney with some buddies. ???   [sm_eekdance] [sm_fingersx]

ahhhhhhh gotcha.

well, you did jinx yourself with that never played better post i guess
  [sm_devil] [sm_beertoast]

I'm back in 'merka. A little practice tomorrow to remember the swing from a week off and then my ryder cup round Monday.

Let's go Foreskins!

I'm off in about a half hour to play my round.

Probably a mistake, but once again I'm playing a course that I've never set foot on.  Used to drive by it while working, and it sure looks pretty (http://www.tyogacc.com/).

I got my round in yesterday.

Was a completely out of the blue, 'hey, it's not raining, want to play golf?', 'pick you up in an hour' call from friends.

Was doubly cool because it was my wedding anniversary so I reallllllly wasn't expecting to play.  Her indoors took pity on a twice weekly rained off sad bloke as long as I didn't drink much and took her out last night.

Wahay.

Can't seem to find their website though and the card is in a friend's car.

Will work on getting the details.

Not where I wanted to play my round but way better than not having a score to turn in. 

It's raining again today....

Nicely done Cap.  You play golf on your anniversary and I think I'm smooth.   [sm_anon]

I got out today on a non-GHRC round and played the front nine well.  I can always count on myself to make a bollocks of a plan.   

Sorry Team TIT.  I just submitted my score from today, and I sukked donkey balls.

I'm not sure if I could have played any worse.

Oh well..... :P

It's looking bad for me. Rain, rain, and more rain. Work and kids out of school and sick. Parents out of town.

No trying to make any excuses but I don't think I'll get a round in by the deadline.

Just submitted my scores from today's round.

Shot well but then again my 37 in the first round got me beat 4&3.  :sad3:

Let's go 'skins!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Want some cheese?

 ;D

Go play in a tornado.  :P ;)

Off for round 2 in an hour.  Wish me luck *funbags*.   :isaac:

may the bogeys be with you.
 [sm_devil]

Your evil curse worked... or did it?

47 (+11) for a differential of 10.0.  Playing off 16.5 right now so that's not so good.

I'll leave the Stableford score double-dog-dare-secret for now.  :o

BTW, I blame my score on the fact that no *funbags* wished me luck.    >:(

 [sm_devil]

Come on UB, Chin up!......Your starting to sound like a whinging Pom! ::)

Ouch.   :bricks:

With the score of Round 1 we figured no luck was needed.   [sm_devil]

Good luck Beattie.

Clive has posted some match reports on page #1.  Yay Clive. 

Aske, we suck.   :-[

Congrats to all winners.  Condolences to all losers. 

C'mon *funbags*.  Let's not let the Fleshy Extra Bits back in it!!!

Me win match? Unpossible.  [sm_shock]

Wait, I'm giving this guy a stroke????

*fudge* that.... ;D

Nice playing...

Thanks.  Although I was 9 over on the back 9    :sad3:

Hey, what's with the sandbagging crack! :boxing: [sm_sumo] [sm_enguard] :finger: :)
Frankly, I wish I was good enough to sandbag :sad3: [sm_banghead]

BTW, congrats to the winners. [sm_beertoast]

MFAWG, those are the nine-hole course indices.  You gave him TWO strokes.

Beautiful. *fudge*in' beautiful... :)

I actually don't have the card in front of me, but I think my back wasn't any better than my front. Maybe a 3 stroke differential or so?

Well, I hasten to add that he also outplayed you.   [sm_devil] :)

I'm thinking 6 over would have beat me handily heads up, as I believe I only had 2 pars on the front, and one double bogey at least...

Just a heads-up that as of right now, the following people still haven't turned in scores:

WHITE-MEATS:
Salamander
Campy
TFT
twoiron

MALE-PREPUCES:
Spanky
Clive
JDerion
Teed
Golfer Ray

while the  the '96'  is on paper plausible, anyone who has played this course -- in its current design -- and its typical 'condition' --  knows it to be anything but 'easy' .   now if you have it to yourself, no cars driving through the holes, and they've mowed it recently so that there is actually a fairway amidst the rough, and the greens actually let the ball roll more than 1 foot between unrepaired pitch marks...  sigh...   ;)   the slope rating is mainly just because there are no real hazards, and the course is shorter than crap.

My score was created last Saturday, hoping to pick up the card I need today.

(replied to the PM before I saw it in the thread)

Still got another day.   ;)

 [sm_beertoast]

Aske, you played without Sal?

(http://www.degrassi-boards.com/images/smilies/violin2.gif)

Shame that snappy little Honda of yours won't make it all the way to another golf course.

Hide the children and break out the Clorox.  When Clive gives men presents it can get messy.

LOL.  well, that's pretty witty. 8)   unfortunately,  for those of us non-lawyer types who don't get to set our own hours.. or at least play golf while on billable client hours  ;) , getting to any other public access course in the area on a weekday after work @ 430 or 5pm and playing 9 before sunset in/around the burgh?    .... ummm.... unpossible. 

Clive has PMS.

Erm, PMs.

Go *funbags*.

 [sm_whip]

Clive,

PM sent!  Sorry about the delay.  I've been on a bit of a vacation for the past week.

Got to play today, PM sent.

Scores updated.

Still waiting on ...

WHITE-MEATS:
Salamander
Campy
twoiron

MALE-PREPUCES:
Teed
Golfer Ray

I know GolferRay is playing tomorrow so he will at least have a score to turn in.

Anyone that hasn't played and can, please do.

Deadline was moved to Sunday, so there's still time.

 [sm_fingersx]

I got Ray's score.  I think the other four have all played, I'm just waiting on scorecards.

Good stuff.

 [sm_beertoast]

Well.....  ???

Endless pints of Guinness await.

"Paging twoiron and Teed to the white courtesy phone, please.  Twoiron and Teed, white courtesy phone."

twoiron and Teed, I am still waiting for your scores.

If I don't have it by end of day Wednesday and you're not on my team, you shall forfeit your match.  [sm_devil]

Hey now!!!  Don't get all Ugly Foreskin on us!!!

Sorry to get uppity.  I know how you hate an ugly flap.

Forfeit them both.

2 weeks late, way past deadline.

Still love dem guys, but people are losing interest while this drags out.

D'oh... I sent them through via PM to Clive last weekend...hmmm

I shall resend ASAP.

Sorry 'bout that Chief...

Woot, OK, just forfeit your guy.

 ;D

(Sorry Teed)

 [sm_drinking]

Resent.... ;D

Two more rounds posted.  Still waiting on Teed ... (PM sent).

Final results posted for all matches.

f-a-r-k

Gooooooooooooooooo *funbags*.

Foreskins have to try and come from behind in the final round.

*funbags* like it out front.

 :P

Man I'm blind.  Where is it posted?

http://www.golfhos.com/forum/index.php/topic,3519.0.html

Thanks Brother Aske.  [sm_coffee]

Close round!  Awesome!

 [sm_happy1]

Okay, time for the next round. ;D