|
Title: Today's Waste Of Good Sausage. Post by: stroh on September 09, 2008, 10:50:18 AM Quote Authorities: Burglar wakes men with spice rub Mon Sep 8, 4:44 pm ET FRESNO, Calif. – Authorities say they've arrested a man who broke into the home of two California farmworkers, stole money, rubbed one with spices and whacked the other with a sausage before fleeing. Fresno County sheriff's Lt. Ian Burrimond says 22-year-old Antonio Vasquez was found hiding in a field wearing only a T-shirt, boxers and socks after the Saturday morning attack. He says deputies arrested Vasquez after finding a wallet containing his ID in the ransacked house. The farmworkers told deputies the suspect woke them Saturday morning by rubbing spices on one of them and smacking the other with an 8-inch sausage. Burrimond says money allegedly stolen was recovered. LMAO [sm_laughing] WTF? Title: Re: Today's Waste Of Good Sausage. Post by: Clive on September 09, 2008, 11:44:14 AM "Whacked" him with an "8-inch sausage", huh?
I'm guessing there's more to this story. Title: Re: Today's Waste Of Good Sausage. Post by: Spanky on September 09, 2008, 01:04:42 PM Sounds like a trip to Bandon to me.
Title: Re: Today's Waste Of Good Sausage. Post by: stroh on September 09, 2008, 01:11:42 PM Sounds like a trip to Bandon to me. I'm pretty sure I'm not interested in which one of the group has the 8 inch sausage. Title: Re: Today's Waste Of Good Sausage. Post by: Spanky on September 09, 2008, 01:13:04 PM Well Clive does have a 35" inseam.
Title: Re: Today's Waste Of Good Sausage. Post by: dystopia on September 11, 2008, 02:49:07 PM It didn't go to waste!
Assault With An 8-Inch Sausage http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/0908081sausage1.html?link=rssfeed Quote Santiago Cabrera told deputies that he was sleeping on the home's front porch when he "felt something hit him in the face," the report notes. Struggling to awake, Cabrera found "an unknown male bent over him. The male continued to strike him in the face and head area with a sausage." Santiago, deputies reported, "said the sausage was about 8" long." Another resident, Cesar Macias, recalled that he was sleeping on a futon in the family room when the intruder threw Pappy's seasoning in his face. The Fresno-based Pappy's specializes in "high quality all purpose spice blends, sauces and marinades," according to its web site. Before fleeing the residence, Vasquez, for some reason, removed his shorts, which contained his driver's license, credit cards, school IDs, and cell phone. He ran into a nearby orange orchard, but was soon apprehended by a deputy who noted that the suspect was wearing "a white sleeveless tee shirt and green boxers." However, cops were unable to recover Vasquez's principal weapon. "I asked Santiago where the sausage was," Deputy George Ozburn wrote, "he advised his dog ate it." |