GolfHos

(http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/664/bandonnt0.jpg)

Well, what a trip!

Saturday, 01DEC2007:
My flights were *fudge*ed -- United had fiddled with my itinerary, and none of the flights I'd booked in August remained intact.  I flew into Eugene OR via Denver instead, arriving a little later but still OK.  I then bickered with United about my return schedule, which was unworkable.  Got it sorted, Uisce and Mark pulled up.  Couldn't find my luggage, which had disappeared while I was dealing with United.  Found it, loaded things.  Nice drive to Bandon Dunes, including a stop for an excellent sandwich at the Safeway in Florence OR.  Yum.  Checked in, noticed it was a bit windy, then caught sight of the printed forecast at the front desk: 50*, rain (not showers or drizzle, mind you), winds of 52-55mph.  OK.  Got settled, enjoyed some not-on-the-menu-but-custom-made-for-us bangers and mash.  Oh, and some Guinness.

Sunday, 02DEC2007:
Bandon was enduring a couple of merged storms bringing a lot of warm air and moisture up from the South Pacific, along with high winds.  After looking at the weather, feeling the very strong winds and even stronger gusts, the pelting rain, and vacillating, Uisce, his brother Mark and I played Pacific Dunes (http://www.bandondunesgolf.com/p_dunes.cfm) on Sunday.  Mark peeled off in the middle of the fourth hole with a medical issue.  Uisce and I plodded on, savoring the challenge of trying to play in winds of 50-55 mph with gusts of over 80mph.  Of course, that doesn't even factor in the rain, which occasionally turned to small hailstones.  I actually carded two pars, both on par-3s (the fewer times I have to hit the ball before putting, the better).  Otherwise, it was as brutal as you'd imagine, except worse.

Actually, I have to admit that this round was a blast.  Uisce and I never lost our good humo(u)r throughout, and the severe winds made every shot a mental and physical adventure.  Lots of great shots; lots of goods shots that were just barely on the wrong side of the wind ... and ended in tears; and with a few scabby shots thrown in.  I lost seven balls overall; to compare, I lost more than twice that many in perfect conditions during a round in May.

Home, hot showers all around (done separately, I'll have you know), then meet at the pub and lay into dinner and a few pints.  Uisce and his brother have slightly less an Irish accent than David Feherty but the same inflection.  Also, neither is anywhere as funny, wealthy, or accomplished on the course.  They can drink, though, and are pleasant enough company.  We made it through dinner, perhaps 2-3 pints, and about seven minutes of the Steelers-Cincinnati game when the power went out.  Sat in darkness for a little longer than we expected, then the generator kicked on ... but the pub remained without power.  We broke and went our separate ways, I to my lodge room and they to their swank cottage accommodations.  Their un-powered swank cottage accommodations.  No lights, no heat, no nothing -- just two men trying to keep warm in the Oregon wilderness.

Monday, 03DEC2007:
Oregon was closed on Monday.

The power was still out.  In an unheard-of move, Bandon Dunes closed all three courses for inclement weather.  The forecast was for winds topping 90mph; the closure was in the interest of golfer safety, not course condition.  And so we went down into the bowels of the lodge that morning to The Bunker and began drinking.  Well, Uisce and Mark did -- with no Guinness on draft, I had one beer and waited for something to interest me.  That something manifested itself as the generator dying.  We sat in the little subterranean bar, a few candles scrounged up and lit, and waited.  And waited.  Finally, we were kicked out to the upstairs Tufted Puffin (hey, I didn't name it!).  The Bunker waived our beer tab, which bummed me out that I hadn't drunk more.

A "break" between storms Monday evening.  Just light pelting rain, steady wind, and gusts that knocked me a step sideways.
(http://img451.imageshack.us/img451/2060/bandonstorm4zc4.jpg)

After a few more beers, we wrangled some sandwiches.  Eventually, the power came back, so we got some hot food.  I got pretty tired by this point and called it an evening, while Uisce and Mark closed the joint.  Our waitress scored herself a fat tip by calling Uisce a wanker, although not in so many words.

Tuesday, 04DEC2007:
Up early (0445 PT), I packed, cleaned up, and made ready for the day's golf.  We played Bandon Dunes (http://www.bandondunesgolf.com/b_dunes.cfm) in the nicest weather of the trip: 50s, winds of perhaps only 30-35mph, and a prevailing fog that rose and fell like PaunchyBald's manboobs when running back to the tee to re-load.

A few random other pictures from the round:

The picturesque 5th hole at Bandon Dunes, according to their pretty pictures and what we got:
(http://www.bandondunesgolf.com/images/bandon_hole5main.jpg)(http://img138.imageshack.us/img138/2516/bandon5as5.jpg)

Uisce readies for his second shot on the par-3 fifteenth.
(http://img132.imageshack.us/img132/6319/bandon15jon3ln9.jpg)

A few deer, just off the fifteenth green.  As in just a few feet from us.
(http://img147.imageshack.us/img147/1259/deer3nh5.jpg)

Bandon Dunes' 16th hole, according to their pretty pictures and what we got:
(http://www.bandondunesgolf.com/images/bandon_hole16main.jpg)(http://img80.imageshack.us/img80/9292/bandon16teerq0.jpg)

And the players (L-R): Clive, Mark, Uisce.  Note the gentle wind.
(http://img147.imageshack.us/img147/7069/bandongang2vy9.jpg)

hey, golf and bad weather is better than no golf at all. glad you guys could hook up. may i suggest trying pre-winter in the future.  :)

did you say 90mph winds? [sm_shock]

Very nice.   8)



Amateur.


All in all, sounds like a trying trip.  Other than some good time spent with good company.

I'm still waiting for the Bandon Dunes' "pretty picture" analog(ue) of this one:

LOL that last pic. The big tall dudes standing straight up and the midget is leaning into the wind.

Brother from another mother... and father.  A bit like a cousin really.

Good work on the snaps CW.  It was not photo-friendly weather.  And trust me boys and girls, it was every bit as bad as "90 mph winds with heavy rain" sounds.  But good times were had by all, we did manage to get in a bit of golf and we have stories.  It's all about the stories.

Speaking of stories.  We can't really tell it over the wire as it simply doesn't translate but our lovely waitress naming me wanker was just about the funniest thing I've ever heard.  We laughed 'til we cried.  You truly had to be there though. 

Crazy thing about bunker mentality was that all these normally polite, prim and proper resort employees were dropping language and acting as crass as the rest of us.  Too funny.

Have to agree with all sentiments expressed by our beloved counselor although I haven't felt up PaunchyBald yet so I'll take that on reputation alone. 

Next year!!!  Sign up sheets available by PM. 

>:(

Wind was coming from the camera.  So there!!!

But since you brought it up... the midget got in 2.5 rounds while the best the big people could do was 36 holes.  We're all hardcore but I'm the hardcoriest.  So there.

[sm_headbang]

UB, I always thought that you were an old grey haired old man. [sm_shock]
I didn't realise that you are young. :-[ :-[ :-[

Great pictures.

Us NorthWest coasters call this "The Pineapple Express", and it can be something to behold, in fact we're still beholding enough water that part of I-5 to Portland is closed.

Is it my imagination or is Mr. Yuk grabbing that other fellers arse?

And just what does Uisce have in his right lower pocket? Packing heat Uisce Beatha or were you just happy to be there?

Looks like fun you guys, love the pics and the story.  :)

i'd sue for false advertisement
 :o

Nice report Clive. At least you have stories about Bandon '07 to tell the rest of your life.   [sm_buddies]

If you must know, 'The fat bald one' doesn't run anywhere.  I'll have you know I took the WALK of shame back to the tee.

I could feel Clive's eyes burning a hole in me bum all the way though.  I put in a bit more wiggle and jiggle just for his benefit.  I'm no saint and he's kinda dreamy. [sm_naughty]

Not so old.  Not so young.  Some gray hairs.  Mostly brown though. 

Handsome in a Mel Gibson booking photo sorta way. 

You have to remember, Gerontius Took lived to 130.  Short of perishing in a Pac NW cyclone I expect no less.

Complete with spewed incoherent profanities.

Coincidentally, there was some sort of a Jewish discussion.  I was too buzzed to really remember the meat of it but I think we meant Scottish.  Either way, Clive was mortified. 

I've noticed when he gets like that, a gentle segue to junk talk straightens him right up.  So to speak.

Bandon really ought to hire clive and U.B. to write their travel brochure.

So here is a photo of UB drunk at the bar, just before the waitress called him a wanker. ;D ;D ;D

UB's mug shot.........................yes they forgot to put that bit in their story. ::)

cool!  8)

Kewl!  Sounds like a good time.