I was speechless.... totally without speech...

you say....

Wanne see my baculum collection?

A world of difference you know.  A quantum leap even. 

Hey twoiron, what was her name, Asif.......................

I was hustling to get to a chautauqua earlier, so I couldn't give this my fullest attention.

"Anything that crosses your mind" is the correct answer to the question, "What do you say to that??" after an extremely spankable young lady has essentially given you the warm.humid.grotto surrenders sign.

You may ask yourself, "Blader, what do you mean by that?"

Thank you, for the question.  I'll explain.

A spankable woman who speaks provocatively enough during a casual, public encounter to stimulate a measurable testicular surge......is a spankable woman who is testing you. 

She is conducting a test and looking for two possible outcomes.

First, she is looking to see whether you go speechless.  If this occurs, you have lost.  You are not fitting prey to her parry. The humidity in her warm humid grotto has shifted to desert like conditions.  She will copulate with the mail room boy that evening, because he can be trusted to endure her pettiness.  Game over for you.

Second, she is looking for you to say anything at all.  If you blurt out anything at all, it is a clear sign to her that you are a ****ual experimentalist willing to try anything she desires...in a bed, in a jacuzzi, even out on the naked girders of a growing high rise building.  If you say anything at all, no matter how imbecilic, her warm humid grotto will shift to "Level IV Capture Status" and chances are, you two won't be back at your desks any time soon.

The third thing she is looking for, and you may notice this by peering into her eyes to see if they dart to your midsection, is any evidence of a perizipper protuberance indicative of a change in your rigid fluid hydraulics system status.  I won't cite the literature chapter and verse, after all, God invented the Google so that everyone can share in the pleasure of knowledge that comes from studying human evolution to its fullest, but it is quite clear that what stimulates the spankable woman's libido more than anything else, and that is visualization of certain gender's male reproductive organs that will remain unmentioned as we are in mixed company.

Unfortunately, you appeared to be speechless and that particular proclivity may very well render you as an evolutionary backwater.  Sure, you've contributed to the survival of your species, but you could have been so much more.....   

No problem.  I derive extreme gratification from being of service to an otherwise completely anonymous intertube colleague.

Mail room boys are never "that good"...which is why they are mail room boys...and also explains why women who copulate with mail room boys are never completely satiated. 

I would have thought this was obvious.... 

Brantley Foster is a fictional character in a rather uninspired if not clumsy attempt to fuse the rags-to-riches tradition of Anacreon's Artemon with Antigone's concepts of forbidden love.

I was all just so....what is the word I'm searching for here....improbable, not to mention bereft of metaphor.

And if you'll recall, the Cristy Wills character was a virgin**.

There is no resemblance whatsoever between this movie and the situation our Colleague Two-Iron finds himself in each day at smoke break.

______________________
footnotes
 **The reader is reminded this was set in an age (post-Disco americana) when virginal women were both outcasts and few and far between.  His attraction to virginal women therefore is an indication of Mr. Foster's overall impotence and ****ual naivety.   The viewer concludes this is not a character one would ever hope to emulate.