GolfHos
 
*
December 06, 2019, 02:29:57 PM
Username: Password: Duration:

Seriously, I'm Not Gay.

 
Pages: [1] 2   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.  (Read 2537 times)
0 Members and 1 Lurker/Spider are viewing this topic.
stroh
Sleeveless Hoodie
From: Impact Crater Springs, CA

Karma: 155
Posts: 16135
Offline Offline

We're doomed!

View ProfileIgnore this user
Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« on: January 25, 2007, 06:55:26 PM »

So,

The other night, I was on the phone with a fellow GolfHoian.  Talked for a while, helped me out with some things. 

The next morning, Karen says "So, how was your mom?"

Easy conclusion;  the call came late at night, after the girls were in bed, I was on the phone for a while, and I moved about the house a lot. (Basement, upstairs, garage, etc.)  I do this whenever I talk on the phone, its a nervous habit....I have a phone phobia, but esp. present when with my mom.(fodder for another thread, oh baby!)

I say, "Oh, it wasn't her.......it was one of the guys from 'my golf dealie'....."
Eyes roll.

"And what, who, why???  you were on the phone........why is he calling you?"
 Cry Red Face

segue: Karen's view/interpretation of the internets is circa late '90s.  It's used for 3 things. 

pr÷˝:  Hard to argue this one.

Child abduction:   I already got a kid of my own, and I damn sure don't want the hassle of someone else's.

Online chat & "hookup"  Of course popular America has turned this into an entirely homo****ual activity.

Ah Ha!  we have a winner.  If I'm online, I'm finding people to "chat" with, and hook up.  I don't know where.  We have no alleys, and if you're parked for more than a minute or two, Barney Fife offers to help.  Although I give her credit, she is expanding, but still limits herself to paying the car insurance online, and her universe in basically limited to the MSN homepage, and horoscopes.

Return:  I explain (and deep down, she knows, 'cause I've told her a thousand times, it's a golf forum.  Hell, I've even let here read posts I've written. In retrospect, showing her the "pun" thread from the other place, may have worked against me.)  that it was golf forum business, and it was nice to chat/get to know a friend.

Again with the eyes.  She just doesn't get it.  I'll give her the fact that she appreciates: "This is a golf dealie?" yes  "But you don't talk about golf?"  not usually  "And you want to meet these guys in person some time?" well, uh, yes.  "But when you 'chat' with them.........oh nevermind"

Inevitably the conversation ends with me pleading

".........But, I'm not gay"

NTTAWWT of course.
Logged Return to Top
Clive
Full Metal Jacket

Karma: 77
Posts: 4358
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #1 on: January 25, 2007, 06:58:07 PM »

Was this the phone call with me?  'Cause I was wearing chaps the whole time.


Commando.
Logged Return to Top
tdcoly
Tartan Jacket
From: The home of misfits, renegades, blowhards, idiots and fools.

Karma: 9
Posts: 1277
Offline Offline

Us Dags

View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #2 on: January 25, 2007, 07:05:17 PM »

Now, now boys. Devil
Logged Return to Top

"I'm only speeding 'cause I really have to poop"-as seen on a bumper sticker
Spanky
Full Metal Jacket

Karma: 48
Posts: 4841
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #3 on: January 25, 2007, 07:19:20 PM »

Was this the phone call with me?  'Cause I was wearing chaps the whole time.


Commando.
Thanks for that vision. Now I'm going to have to look at port to get that out of my head.
Logged Return to Top
Clive
Full Metal Jacket

Karma: 77
Posts: 4358
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #4 on: January 25, 2007, 07:23:23 PM »

Was this the phone call with me?  'Cause I was wearing chaps the whole time.


Commando.
Thanks for that vision. Now I'm going to have to look at port to get that out of my head.
I think it goes better with a shiraz.
Logged Return to Top
stroh
Sleeveless Hoodie
From: Impact Crater Springs, CA

Karma: 155
Posts: 16135
Offline Offline

We're doomed!

View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2007, 07:23:54 PM »

Was this the phone call with me?  'Cause I was wearing chaps the whole time.


Commando.
Thanks for that vision. Now I'm going to have to look at port to get that out of my head.

Well, careful how you type the header.  That's where his number and picture came up. Naughty
Logged Return to Top
Fuzzy
Full Metal Jacket
From: Island of Misfit Toys

Karma: 61
Posts: 4836
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #6 on: January 25, 2007, 07:32:45 PM »

Was this the phone call with me?  'Cause I was wearing chaps the whole time.


Commando.
Thanks for that vision. Now I'm going to have to look at port to get that out of my head.
I think it goes better with a shiraz.

Great. Now when I open that bottle of shiraz I have I'll think of this thread. And chap wearing patent lawyers.

There's a sentence I would've bet I'd never write in my life.
Logged Return to Top

"You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose."
From Oh the Places You'll Go, by Dr. Seuss (Theodor Geisel)
Clive
Full Metal Jacket

Karma: 77
Posts: 4358
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #7 on: January 25, 2007, 07:34:09 PM »

Don't forget the feather boa.
Logged Return to Top
Aske
Lederhosen

Karma: 120
Posts: 31318
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #8 on: January 25, 2007, 07:34:59 PM »

gay.straight.don't be so suburban. it's the new millenium.  it's all the same now
Logged Return to Top

Quote
Russia has invaded a sovereign neighboring state and threatens a democratic government elected by its people. Such an action is unacceptable in the 21st century.
--  Chimpy McFlightsuit, CEO of Bu$hco Industries of 'Merka
Spanky
Full Metal Jacket

Karma: 48
Posts: 4841
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #9 on: January 25, 2007, 08:48:18 PM »

gay.straight.don't be so suburban. it's the new millenium.  it's all the same now

Whatever. I live in Texas and that doesn't fly.

However I grew up in New York so that makes perfect sense.

Gowd I am at odds with myself.
Logged Return to Top
Aske
Lederhosen

Karma: 120
Posts: 31318
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2007, 08:53:18 PM »

gay.straight.don't be so suburban. it's the new millenium.  it's all the same now

Whatever. I live in Texas and that doesn't fly.

However I grew up in New York so that makes perfect sense.

Gowd I am at odds with myself.

just quoting the master.... from one of the best films ever.
 Cool
Logged Return to Top

Quote
Russia has invaded a sovereign neighboring state and threatens a democratic government elected by its people. Such an action is unacceptable in the 21st century.
--  Chimpy McFlightsuit, CEO of Bu$hco Industries of 'Merka
dyno
Golf Shirt
From: the bath tub

Karma: 6
Posts: 200
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #11 on: January 25, 2007, 08:57:09 PM »

You are most ungay.  The forum 'fellaz' that often came to the house initially left my wife concerned. Now she's used to it...she makes them wear assless chaps even.
Logged Return to Top
stroh
Sleeveless Hoodie
From: Impact Crater Springs, CA

Karma: 155
Posts: 16135
Offline Offline

We're doomed!

View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #12 on: January 25, 2007, 08:58:32 PM »

You are most ungay.  The forum 'fellaz' that often came to the house initially left my wife concerned. Now she's used to it...she makes them wear assless chaps even.

Grazi! Grin
Logged Return to Top
Seamus
Straitjacket

Karma: 52
Posts: 2376
Offline Offline

I'm a juvenile acting product of the working class

View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #13 on: January 25, 2007, 10:13:59 PM »

Like you have time to be gay.
Logged Return to Top
Dunk
Vest & Plus Fours

Karma: 14
Posts: 984
Offline Offline


View ProfileIgnore this user
Re: Seriously, I'm Not Gay.
« Reply #14 on: January 25, 2007, 11:02:45 PM »

you're as fine a bundle of sticks as I've ever seen.
Logged Return to Top
Pages: [1] 2   Return to Top
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Related Posts
Things I Never Expected To Hear - Part I
When I was in college, I worked for Kinko's and easily 30-40% of the employ
by spacey

we must act now to prevent gay rat marriage !
I think those gay rats should have the right to get married, so they can have th
by Jules

NTTAWWT....
A woman's email to Telecom New Zealand's help desk was rejected becaus
by twoiron

Gay Top Gun
Is there any possibility a guy with the call name Slider is [i]not[/i] gay?
by spacey

 


 
  Powered by SMF | SMF © 2001-2009, Lewis Media

Dilber MC Theme by HarzeM