Walfredo
Straitjacket
Karma: 18 Posts: 2013
 OfflinePaintin the town brown
 
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**URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« on: June 16, 2008, 07:52:43 AM » |
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My fellow Golfho's, Don't try and take off your right golf shoe using your bare left foot on the heel while tired after walking 18 holes. You may slip and pull of your big toenail with your spike.      OMFG WTF it hurts I now have no *goshdarn* big toe nail on my left foot. Wearing shoes *goshdarn* sucks so bad today, and I gimped into work like a *fudge* head. Kill me please. For everyone's sake I won't post pics. |
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For hither not, I am the stallion.
Come fear, come love, I am the stallion.
You know that I am the stallion, mang.
I am, I am the stallion, mang.
You know that I am the stallion, mang.
I live, I walk, I am the stallion, mang.
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birdymaker
Straitjacket From: a third world country in the making
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #1 on: June 16, 2008, 08:03:24 AM » |
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i'm sorry for your pain and agony,   i can't even imagine the amount of force required to accomplish this. |
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women are like tornados. In the beginning there's a lot of sucking and blowing. In the end, the car's gone, the house is gone..
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gleek
Flak Jacket
Karma: 107 Posts: 9510
OfflineE chu ta!
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #2 on: June 16, 2008, 08:09:29 AM » |
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At least you got to play. HTFU
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Woman, open the door, don't let it sting. I wanna breathe that fire again.
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stroh
Sleeveless Hoodie From: Impact Crater Springs, CA
Karma: 155 Posts: 16135
OfflineWe're doomed!
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #3 on: June 16, 2008, 08:23:05 AM » |
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At least you got to play. HTFU
LOL  Yeah! And who the hell walks a golf course anyway? STFU |
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Walfredo
Straitjacket
Karma: 18 Posts: 2013
OfflinePaintin the town brown
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #4 on: June 16, 2008, 08:24:55 AM » |
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At least you got to play. HTFU
  true ok hardening the *fudge* up now |
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For hither not, I am the stallion.
Come fear, come love, I am the stallion.
You know that I am the stallion, mang.
I am, I am the stallion, mang.
You know that I am the stallion, mang.
I live, I walk, I am the stallion, mang.
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spacey
Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat From: Group W Bench
Karma: 98 Posts: 7733
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #5 on: June 16, 2008, 08:40:31 AM » |
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I know exactly what you're going through. Several years ago, while climbing into my wife's (then girlfriend's) car, I ripped the toenail off my left big toe by catching it on the emergency brake pedal (I was wearing sandals). Apparently I let out a string of curse words the likes of which might have made Lisa Lampanelli blush, for which I received a sharp reprimand, until she actually saw what I had done. Then she almost passed out.
For your reference, it took about 2 weeks for the pus to start drying up (keep it clean, it's prime for infection), maybe 3-4 weeks before the toenail bed became something less than horrifically sensitive to the touch, and approximately 6 months before I had anything even sort of resembling a normal toenail again.
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Walfredo
Straitjacket
Karma: 18 Posts: 2013
OfflinePaintin the town brown
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #6 on: June 16, 2008, 08:49:14 AM » |
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I know exactly what you're going through. Several years ago, while climbing into my wife's (then girlfriend's) car, I ripped the toenail off my left big toe by catching it on the emergency brake pedal (I was wearing sandals). Apparently I let out a string of curse words the likes of which might have made Lisa Lampanelli blush, for which I received a sharp reprimand, until she actually saw what I had done. Then she almost passed out.
For your reference, it took about 2 weeks for the pus to start drying up (keep it clean, it's prime for infection), maybe 3-4 weeks before the toenail bed became something less than horrifically sensitive to the touch, and approximately 6 months before I had anything even sort of resembling a normal toenail again.
 Thanks. My wife pulled it off of the cuticle (sp?) for me. She actually had it happen a few times while playing tennis growing up and tried to give me that info about it being back to normal in like 6 months. yada yada. And as she saw it the agony of the first week or so came back to memory. She was like, "oh *fudge* it will hurt when you try to wear shoes again." No *feces* honey you think. |
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For hither not, I am the stallion.
Come fear, come love, I am the stallion.
You know that I am the stallion, mang.
I am, I am the stallion, mang.
You know that I am the stallion, mang.
I live, I walk, I am the stallion, mang.
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dystopia
Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat From: Silicon Valley
Karma: 94 Posts: 7929
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #7 on: June 16, 2008, 09:07:13 AM » |
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Holy *feces*  |
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stroh
Sleeveless Hoodie From: Impact Crater Springs, CA
Karma: 155 Posts: 16135
OfflineWe're doomed!
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #8 on: June 16, 2008, 09:20:54 AM » |
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(I was wearing sandals)
Birk.s? |
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spacey
Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat From: Group W Bench
Karma: 98 Posts: 7733
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #9 on: June 16, 2008, 09:23:26 AM » |
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(I was wearing sandals)
Birk.s?Evidently you have mistaken me for a Subaru Outback driving lesbian. |
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stroh
Sleeveless Hoodie From: Impact Crater Springs, CA
Karma: 155 Posts: 16135
OfflineWe're doomed!
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #10 on: June 16, 2008, 09:26:15 AM » |
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(I was wearing sandals)
Birk.s?Evidently you have mistaken me for a Subaru Outback driving lesbian.  +1 |
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Clive
Full Metal Jacket
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #11 on: June 16, 2008, 10:35:01 AM » |
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How *goshdarn* uncoordinated do you have to be to rip a toenail off trying to remove a shoe?!    I smashed my toes into the front of my shoes playing tennis years back. The big toenail went black, pressured built up, it hurt. I drilled a hole in it with a heated jeweler's screwdriver, it shot a geyser of fluid about a foot into the air, and it felt better. Then I smashed it again about two weeks later. Turned black again and came mostly off. Had to rip it off the cuticle. Good times. FWIW, the nail bed never healed all the way -- there's air space under about a quarter of the current nail. I mention this for its relevance to Walfredo: it's a convenient place to store one's contraband. Small quantities, to be sure, but still ... |
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gleek
Flak Jacket
Karma: 107 Posts: 9510
OfflineE chu ta!
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #12 on: June 16, 2008, 12:57:03 PM » |
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Toejam.football.surrenders
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Woman, open the door, don't let it sting. I wanna breathe that fire again.
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Jules
Members Only Jacket From: Australia
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #13 on: June 16, 2008, 01:32:25 PM » |
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Freakin-hell Walfredo, how sharp and strong are the spikes on your golf shoes!!!!
You must of had fantastic traction on the golf course with those shoes.
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The good thing about getting old, is that you can hit the ball out of sight.
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twoiron
Full Metal Jacket From: The Drawing Room
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Re: **URGENT****PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT**
« Reply #14 on: June 16, 2008, 02:12:55 PM » |
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That'll learn ya.... Most normal people take their shoes off by undoing the laces then removing said shoe by hand..  |
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"Nothing says sorry like a warm plate of bacon... or so I'm told"
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